Wanting to Help

Wanting to Help

Dear Youth Ambassadors,
I know this guy who is upset, because he feels like no one is helping him prepare for adulthood. He is 17, and his mom refuses to let him get a job, driver’s license, or car. His mom borrows money from him to do her own thing while he goes without. His family breaks promises to him, and he’s depressed. How can I help him?

Sincerely,
Wanting to Help


Dear Wanting to Help,
I feel he should just sit down and talk to his parents one by one and let them know how he is feeling. His mom probably refuses to let him do certain things, because she’s afraid that when he leaves and goes off on his own, he might never come back. So since he’s not 18 yet, she’s trying to keep him as long as possible. Also, he could try to talk to a counselor.
Sincerely,
A Friend Who Thinks You Can Do This


Dear Wanting to Help,
I think that your friend should get help from other family members that can help him get a job and a driver’s license. Before he does that, I think that he should have a talk with his mom and tell her why he should be able to do things that lead to adulthood. He should tell her that not being able to do these things could possibly affect how he lives later on.
Sincerely,
Your Friend


Dear Wanting to Help,
What!? Um no, you need to talk to this guy and tell him to talk to his mother about it. That’s not right at all. If she doesn’t want to listen, tell her to mother up! You want a job? Get a job! You want a license? Get to studying the book. If you want to do things for yourself that are positive, DO IT! How the hell does his mom want to borrow money from him if she doesn’t even let him get a job? In this life you learn to not depend on others’ promises. Promise yourself things and work towards getting where you want. You’re the only one you can really depend on. When life turns its back on you, take advantage and grab that! In other words, when it’s down hill, find the positive things.
Sincerely,
A Helping Hand

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Wanting to Come Out

Wanting to Come Out

Dear Youth Ambassadors,
I am bisexual and have known for a long time. I recently came out to my mom and aunt. My mom says she will always love me for who I am. When I try to talk about my girlfriend/boyfriend, she says she doesn’t want to hear about it. I want to come out to my entire family now. How should I do this?

Sincerely,
Wanting to Come Out


Dear Wanting to Come Out,
I know how this feels. I’m bisexual also. I think that you should find someone you really trust or you know will have your back and ask them to help you tell them. I know sometimes I just want to leave, so I can be myself and go where no one knows me. But I’ve realized you can’t run forever, so find that person you trust and ask them to help. I also suggest prayer. Even though you’re bisexual, God still loves you, so talk to him.
Sincerely,
A Friend Who Believes in You


Dear Wanting to Come Out,
Okay, so being bisexual is not a bad thing. If you want to come out to your entire family, you should do it. If your mama loves you like she says she does, it shouldn’t matter what anybody else thinks. For real, if your family loves you, it shouldn’t matter what you like as long as you’re happy. That is what should matter.
P.S. I’m bisexual too.
Sincerely,
The Man with the Mohawk


Dear Wanting to Come Out,
I think, as long as your mom knows you’re bisexual, you don’t have to tell anyone else, unless you really want them to know. That’s your business, and it should stay like that.
Sincerely,
Your Friend

Foster Family Fued

Foster Family Fued

Dear Youth Ambassadors,

I live with this foster family. They have two kids and now me and my three siblings. They have two girls and spoil them a lot. My little sister is a hard kid to control, but at the same time my foster-sister is too. Every time my sister and foster sister argue, my foster parents take their own daughter’s side and don’t even listen to my sister’s side. Their other daughter gets to stay up later than my sister, gets more snacks, etc. I just don’t want my sister to feel bad and get treated unfairly. What should I do?

Sincerely,
Foster Family Feud


Dear Foster Family Feud,
Whoever is the oldest needs to step up and say these words of choice: “I’m tired of you always taking your daughter’s side. They are always arguing, and you need to let your daughter know that she needs to chill on this one right here. They are both wrong for arguing but it’s not always just my sister.”
Sincerely,
A Friend in Youth Ambassadors


Dear Foster Family Feud,
Well, if I were you with all that money you make, I would just go buy a whole lot of late night snacks. Then, whenever they do that you can just take your sister up to your room and let her pick out something sweet. But have her eat it in the room, so both of you will not get in trouble.
Sincerely,
A Fellow Youth Ambassador


Dear Foster Family Feud,
This breaks my heart to hear that sides are being taken at all. There should never be a time in my opinion when foster children get treated poorly, because they’ve already been through a lot. Being in a foster home already is tough, because no one knows what goes on in foster homes. When adopting a child you should want to give them the same amount of love you would or actually do give your own children. My advice would be to talk to your foster parents and let them know. Favorites aren’t funny or nice. It’s cruel.
Sincerely,
Your Friend

Not Enough Time

Not Enough Time

Dear Youth Ambassadors,
This year I wanted to try to graduate high school early, but because I am raising my one-year-old brother, I find it difficult to get my schoolwork done. If I’m raising my brother, how do I find the time to do my work? How can I get my family to understand this?

Sincerely,
Not Enough Time


Dear Not Enough Time,
I understand what you are going through, although not on a personal level, I get where you are coming from. Basically, you probably feel alone and that you have to do this. Well, that’s the thing. You don’t have to do it. You might think that if you don’t do it, no one will, but have you ever thought that the reason they don’t do it is because they see you as a support system? The more and more that you just automatically come to the rescue for them, the more they will think they don’t need to do it, because you will. You have to let them know that you can’t always be there, because you have other things to do. It’s okay to say “no” sometimes. It’s not being selfish. You are going to be gone soon and not going to be around that much, so it is good to get this problem addressed now. I also suggest that you make a system where you can watch him a set number of days, and they get the rest. The bottom line is you have to start putting your foot down for you now.
Sincerely,
Your Friend


Dear Not Enough Time,
I understand that you have to try to raise your brother, but I think you can still find time to finish school early. One way to find time to do work is while your brother is asleep. Another way is by just giving the one-year-old things to do to be productive while you are productive on your homework. To get your family to understand your circumstance though, you should talk to them straight up about it. Tell them how you feel. You could have someone else in your family watch your brother at least two hours some days, so you can get your work done. I hope this helps, and you use the advice. Good luck.
Sincerely,
Youth Ambassadors

Sugar Tooth

Sugar Tooth

Dear Youth Ambassadors,
I have a sweet tooth. Extremely sweet tooth. Sugars are not my friend. I’m getting bigger and bigger. I try to control my sweets, but can’t seem to handle it. I mean I do try and eat healthy foods, but working at a fast food place doesn’t help that much. It’s summer, and I’m not happy with my body. I look fine. You can’t tell I’m fat, but put me in a skin tight dress and these love handles are bad. I just wish I knew how to avoid sweets. I want to be happy with my body again.

Sincerely,
Sugar Tooth


Dear Sugar Tooth,
I wanna start off by saying you are very, very beautiful and never let anyone tell you different. You don’t have to be like everyone else. I’m a real skinny girl, and I don’t really like it, because I can barely fit in some outfits. People make fun of me, but I don’t let them get me down. I know sometimes words hurt, but you shouldn’t care about them calling you fat, because you’re not. You’re healthy. It’s also great that you’re trying to eat healthy! Keep up the great work. I’m supporting you Sugar Tooth! You can do this!!
Sincerely,
A Youth Ambassador


Dear Sugar Tooth,
If you think it’s hard to keep up with your weight, then just keep your self-confidence up and don’t worry about other people’s decisions, because everyone is beautiful in their own way. Nobody else’s thoughts should make you feel down about yourself. If you think working at a fast food place won’t help then find another job. That’s just my advice. You do not have to take it if you don’t want to.
Best,
Your Friend

Helping Sister

FullSizeRender (2)Dear Youth Ambassadors,
My big sister is twenty-five years old and has been in and out of jail and juvenile hall since she was in her early teens. I never got to experience that big sister feeling from her. She got out of high school and got on drugs. She then started running away and would be gone for days. She then came home like nothing happened. Before all this trouble started we found out my sister had been getting molested by my grandma’s husband. I always asked myself how she could let this happen to her own grandchild. I would cry all the time seeing my sister down and out and not being able to do anything about it. My sister was also diagnosed with bipolar and schizophrenia. I just couldn’t deal with seeing my sister fall apart right before my eyes. For a long time I hated my grandma. I felt like she was the reason for everything with my sister. Still to this day my sister is in and out of jail, and we are trying our best to keep her off drugs. I hope for a better future for my sister and pray she will change her life.

Sincerely,
Helping Sister


Dear Helping Sister,
My Mother started doing drugs when I was ten years old and has been in and out of my life since. One day I got so sick of her coming in and out my life that I just stopped dealing with her. I miss her like crazy all the time. But you can’t keep helping someone who doesn’t want to be helped, no matter how badly you may wanna help. They have to want the help as badly as you. Sit your sister down and express to her how you feel about this situation. Also with the grandma situation, you should also talk to your grandma and ask her what happened.
“Just because the past didn’t turn out like you wanted it to, doesn’t mean your future can’t be better than you’ve ever imagined.” Write back!

Sincerely,
A Friend

Stepdad Situation

IMG_4492 (2)Dear YA,

My Stepdad is a real asshole. He is always yelling at my mom and I. My mom can’t have a conversation with him without it turning into an argument. He doesn’t let my mom make any decisions for herself. He never hits her, but he is very verbally abusive. How could my mom and I change the way he is?

Sincerely, Stepdad Situation


Dear Stepdad Situation,

First off, your mom is not in a healthy relationship, you should speak to her about this. It takes two to be in a committed relationship. Your stepdad just wants everything to go his way, and all he thinks about is himself. Your mom doesn’t need to be with him since he is verbally abusive. She should step up, but that night turn into something worst. She needs a break from your stepdad before she gets fed up and does something crazy.

From, A Youth That Understands